I have a really hot waiter.Guys he came back with my food and said, “Careful the plate is hot too.” So I asked, “too?” and hE TOUCHED MY SHOULDER THEN MADE A SIZZLING NOISE.IM FREAKING OUT WHAT DO I DO.
wanna know what these all say?
"suck his dick"
THERE’S TIMES WHEN I WANT A RUSTIC CABIN IN THE WOODS AWAY FROM ALL SOCIETY
THEN THERE’S TIMES WHEN I WANT A MODERN ASS HOUSE
THEN I’M LIKE I’LL ACCEPT NOTHING MORE THAN A VICTORIAN MANOR
THEN I WANT A PENTHOUSE IN THE MIDDLE OF NEW YORK
THEN I WANT ONE OF THOSE HOUSE MADE OUT SHIPPING CONTAINERS
THEN I WANT A FRENCH CHATEAU
BUT I ALSO WANT A TREE HOUSE
AND A LITTLE COTTAGE ON THE OCEAN
HOUSES ARE SO COOL
You are fucking kidding me
aww its a cute gif of a shark trying to bite but his mouth’s too smAHHHHWHAT THE FUCK IS THAT SHIT OH MY GOD STOP NO STOP STOP STOP
if anybody is interested in being even more scared: these motherfuckers have been found in most oceans around the world and have existed for over 30 million years
The deep ocean is as close to hell as it gets man, this things a fucking nightmare
I really like it when bands keep recording after the song is over and put it on the album and you can hear them talking and laughing and joking and yelling and stuff, that’s really cool.
i really hate it when i’m trying to be cute on snapchat and take a selfie like so
but then the app lags for like 20 years and i end up capturing my true form
no thank you
I feel so proud when friends tell me their parents like me. Like damn right they do, I am a delight.
i wonder how many people i’m in the “i’d be down if you asked” zone with